300+ Funny Nurse Sayings to Make Everyone Laugh

Looking for a way to lift your spirits and help you get through your longest shift? We’ve got you covered! In this article, we’re providing the ultimate list of funny (and relatable) nurse sayings to relieve stress and tension on the job. We’ll also cover the benefits of nurse humor, plus where you can find funny nurse memes.

Hilarious Nurse Sayings & Quotes

“Nurses: Here to save your butt, not kiss it.”
“I’m a nurse. What’s your superpower?” — Unknown
“Nurses can’t fix stupid… but we can sedate it.” — Unknown
“Nurse life: Where coffee is a food group and sleep is a myth.”
“If we survived the night shift together, we can survive anything.”
“I’m a nurse because ‘miracle worker’ isn’t an official title.” — Unknown
“The only thing crazier than a nurse’s schedule is a patient’s prognosis.”

Never Say It’s Quiet: A Nurse’s Rule of Thumb

Nurses also have a superstition about saying things are “quiet.” According to nurse Ighodalo Oribhabor, “If the hospital is quiet and someone says, ‘Wow, it’s so quiet today,’ everyone will freak out. Because right after that, it always gets hectic, new admissions, confused patients, emergencies. Never say it’s quiet!^{[1]
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Ighodalo Oribhabor
Nurse and Nursing Content Creator

Expert Interview}

Section 1 of 13:

Funny Nurse Sayings & Quotes

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Share a funny nurse quote or saying to lift spirits and alleviate stress. If you’re feeling a bit down in the middle of your shift, some good ol’ nurse humor can act as a coping mechanism and brighten your mood. Here are the funniest nurse sayings and quotes to get you through the day (or night):^{[2]
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- “The only thing crazier than a nurse’s schedule is a patient’s prognosis.”
- “Treat the patient as a whole, not just the hole in the patient.” — Unknown
- “A shift in nursing is like a box of chocolates, unpredictable and sometimes messy.”
- “I’m a nurse. My patience is limited, and I’ve already used most of it on my patients.”
- “You can tell when a patient is feeling better when she starts to wear makeup.” — Jenn O’Keefe
- “Be nice to your nurse. They’re the person who chooses your catheter size.” — Unknown
- “Nurse: The first person you see after saying, ‘Hold my beer and watch this!’” — Unknown
- “I’ve come to the realization that I’ll touch anything as long as I have gloves on.” — Unknown
- “May your scrubs be comfy, your coffee be strong, and your Monday be short.” — Unknown
- “Every nurse has a best friend, Pam: LorazePAM, DiazePAM, and ClonazePAM.” — Unknown
- “The nurse that can smile when things go wrong… is probably going off duty.” — Unknown
- “Why yes, I do marathons. It’s called a 12.5+ hour nurse shift run 3 times a week.” — Unknown
- “Nurses are the only people who can keep a straight face while asking about your poop schedule.”
- “When I heard 2020 was going to be the year of the nurse, it was not what I expected…” — Unknown
- “They can put up with me, so you know that’s a good company.” — Olivia Mason, Care Options for Kids LPN
- “You know you’re a nurse when your finger has gone places you never thought possible.” — Unknown
- “I love being a nurse, but I mostly love wearing scrubs. They’re basically professional pajamas.” — Unknown
- “Nursing is a tough job. I mean, where else can you get paid to wake people up and ask them if they’ve pooped?”
- “Sometimes I have to remind myself around my non-nurse friends not to talk about bodily functions.” — Unknown
- “3 AM: The time when you remember you forgot to chart that thing, bring that lady her water, or pass that med.” — Unknown
- “The 3 words most people want to hear: ‘I love you.’ The 3 words nurses want to hear: ‘Alert, Oriented, and Ambulatory.” — Unknown
- “You know you work in healthcare when you can discuss puke and bowel movements at the lunch table and no one flinches.” — Unknown
- “Don’t let anyone treat you like an expired 24 butterfly gauge. You are a #16 in the left forearm with excellent venous return!” — Unknown
- “Being a nurse is weird. I can keep a poker face through trauma but have a mental breakdown over losing my favorite pen.” — Unknown
- “You know that feeling when you meet someone and your heart skips a beat? Yeah, that’s arrhythmia. You can die from that.” — Unknown
- “How can anybody hate nurses? Nobody hates nurses. The only time you hate a nurse is when they’re giving you an enema.” — Warren Beatty
- “Once a nurse, always a nurse. No matter where you go or what you do, you can never truly get out of nursing. It’s like the Mafia… you know too much.” – Deb Gauldin, RN

Section 2 of 13:

Short & Funny Nurse Sayings

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Get a quick laugh with a short and funny nurse saying. A quick shot of humor is the perfect way to decompress after a high-pressure moment or emotionally intense situation. Here are some short and sweet nurse sayings to keep your spirits up:^{[3]
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- “Putting the ‘RN’ in ‘really not okay.’”
- “Med cart’s a mess, but so is my life.”
- “It’s not hoarding if it’s medical supplies.”
- “Nurses: Here to save your butt, not kiss it.”
- “A nurse’s blood type? Coffee.” — Unknown
- “Hospice nurses do it till you die.” — Unknown
- “I’m a nurse—nothing scares me.” — Unknown
- “I might look calm, but I’m spiraling on the inside.”
- “A nurse’s superpower? Multitasking!” — Unknown
- “I’m a nurse. What’s your superpower?” — Unknown
- “RN stands for refreshments and narcotics.” — Unknown
- “Nightshift nurse: Keeping ‘em alive til 7:05.” — Unknown
- “I may be short, but my reach goes far.” — Maya Angelou
- “I became a nurse for the fame and fortune.” — No one ever
- “Nurses can’t fix stupid… but we can sedate it.” — Unknown
- “I whisper to myself, ‘I’m a nurse’ when I question my sanity.”
- “A nurse's mind: Like a browser with 30 tabs open at all times.”
- “You can’t fix crazy, all you can do is document it.” — Unknown
- “I use the Nurse’s Eye Roll—more effective than any medication.”
- “Who needs a gym membership when you're lifting patients all day?”
- “No, I will not rub your feet. I am a nurse, not a masseur.” — Unknown
- “Be nice to nurses. They keep the doctor from accidentally killing you.”
- “I’m a nurse because ‘miracle worker’ isn’t an official title.” — Unknown
- “Save one life, you’re a hero. Save a hundred lives, you’re a nurse.” — Unknown
- “Don’t mess with me — I get paid to poke people with sharp objects.” — Unknown
- “A new nurse gets scared when a doctor yells. An old nurse yells back.” — Unknown
- “If I collapse at work, here’s a list of doctors I don’t want working on me!” — Unknown
- “I have restraints and Ativan, and I’m not afraid to use them.” — Deborah Barnes, RN
- “Not saying I’m a big deal, but the government classifies me as essential.” — Unknown
- “Remember, I’m a nurse. You’re going to have to say a lot to gross me out.” — Unknown

Section 3 of 13:

Funny Sayings for Nursing Students

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Highlight your stress and lack of sleep with a funny nursing school saying. Are you (barely) surviving on caffeine and chaos? Then, the following sayings will truly speak to you! Here are some funny sayings for nursing students of all years and degrees:^{[4]
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- “Sleep is for the licensed.”
- “Study. Cry. Clinicals. Repeat.”
- “Blood, sweat, and flash cards.”
- “In nursing school, coffee is a food group.”
- “Nursing school: Where caffeine is a vital sign.”
- “Anatomy taught me where my soul used to be.”
- “Scrubs: The official uniform of the sleep deprived.”
- “Why yes, I can tell you if that’s normal poop or not.”
- “Yes, I’m a nursing student. No, I don’t want to look at it.”
- “I’m 90% caffeine, 10% pretending I know what I’m doing.”
- “I’m a nursing student. I haven’t slept since freshman year.”
- “Ask me anything about the Krebs cycle…JK, please don’t.”
- “They said nursing school would be hard. They weren’t wrong.”
- “If nursing school hasn’t broken you yet…wait until Med-Surg.”
- “The Holy Trinity of nursing school: Fluids, stress, and sarcasm.”
- “I’m one bad test away from googling ‘how to become a barista.’”
- “Nursing school: Where you find out that ‘impossible’ is just an opinion.”
- “‘Study break’ is nursing student code for a 3-minute mental breakdown.”
- “Being a nursing student means never having to say, ‘I’m not grossed out.'”
- “Nursing is not a career… It’s a post-apocalyptic survival skill.” — Unknown
- “Laughter is the best medicine… except when treating diarrhea.” — Unknown
- “Nursing school: Where your GPA somehow stands for ‘Great Pain and Agony.’”
- “While that’s correct… it’s not the most correct. This is nursing school.” — Unknown
- “Surviving nursing school is great and all, but have you ever tried sleeping for 7 hours?”
- “The difference between a good nursing student and a great nursing student is caffeine.”
- “Anatomy: Because every student nurse wants to know the exiting path of a cheeseburger.”
- “You know you’re a nursing student when your Friday nights are just you and pathophysiology.”
- “People who ask me what I’m doing tomorrow probably assume I even know what day of the week it is.” — Unknown
- “How many nurses does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None! They delegate it to the nursing student.” — Unknown
- “Nursing school is a lot like giving birth… Once it’s over, you tend to forget just how painful the process really was.” — Unknown

Section 4 of 13:

Funny Nurse Sayings for Graduation

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Celebrate a recent grad with a witty and relatable nurse saying. There’s no better way to congratulate a nursing school grad than by sharing a silly quote about their experience. Here are the funniest quotes for graduation speeches, Instagram captions, or decorating that grad cap:^{[5]
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- “Plot twist: I’m a nurse now.”
- “Call me RN—Real Nervous.”
- “Fully graduated, kinda crashing out.”
- “I still don’t know how to fold my scrubs…”
- “POV: You barely graduated nursing school.”
- “From scrubs and stress to caps and success!”
- “I came. I cared. I conquered…and I charted it.”
- “Graduated with a BSN and PTSD from clinicals.”
- “Now accepting congratulations, cash, and caffeine.”
- “Yes, I graduated. No, I still don’t want to see your rash.”
- “Officially licensed to save lives (and complain about it).”
- “In need of a nap and a snack before I go save the world.”
- “Nursing school didn’t kill me, but it made me wish for a DNR.”
- “They gave me a degree and let me near patients. Bold move.”
- “I’ve got 99 problems, but a nursing exam ain’t one…anymore.”
- “To my fellow nursing grads: We’ve gone from ‘ABCs’ to ‘ABGs.’”
- “Finally done pretending I knew what was happening in clinicals.”
- “I have a degree AND the ability to cry in under 30 seconds. Woo!”
- “I graduated with a nursing degree and a minor in crying in my car.”
- “Shout out to caffeine, group chats, and mild panic attacks. I made it!”
- “Blood, sweat, tears, and…more tears. But hey, I’ve got a degree now!”
- “They said, ‘It’ll be worth it.’ They didn’t say I’d need 50 coffees a week.”
- “Behind every great nurse is a student who Googled everything for 4 years.”
- “Graduated with a degree in nursing and a minor in crying in the supply closet.”
- “Nursing graduation: Where the tears of joy rival the tears shed over care plans.”
- “My graduation cap? It’s a giant Band-Aid to symbolize surviving nursing school.”
- “Here’s to the nursing grad who can now decipher a doctor’s handwriting like a pro!”
- “Watch out, world…new nurse coming through! But seriously, you should be nervous.”
- “Just graduated and I’m already an expert in therapeutic communication (with myself).”
- “Finally graduated! Time to update my status from ‘Student Nurse’ to ‘Sleep Deprived Nurse.’”

Section 5 of 13:

Funny Nurse Sayings About Friendship

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Drop a funny saying or quote to crack up your nurse bestie. Nursing is a bonding experience, to say the least, and sharing a witty saying is the perfect way to reinforce your friendship and lighten the mood at work. Here are the funniest nurse friendship sayings to revive any shift:^{[6]
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- “We speak fluent eye roll.”
- “We go together like tape and IVs.”
- “Friends don’t let friends chart alone.”
- “Work bestie? More like soulmate in scrubs!”
- “If I flatline, you’re deleting my search history.”
- “We save lives and steal each other’s snacks!”
- “Real friends help you hide in the supply closet.”
- “Our friendship is like a latex glove…tight and protective.”
- “Friends in nursing: We can’t fix crazy, but we can document it.”
- “If we survived the night shift together, we can survive anything.”
- “We don’t need wine nights. We have post-shift parking lot rants.”
- “She’s not just my coworker…she’s my emotional support nurse.”
- “Only a nursing friend will laugh at your jokes, no matter how gross.”
- “We don’t do diamonds. We do vitals, IVs, and late-night venting sessions.”
- “Nursing friendships are built on mutual respect and shared hand sanitizer.”
- “If you can’t vent to your nurse bestie after a bad shift, are you even friends?”
- “A nursing friend is someone who’s there for you, even during a code brown.”
- “We laugh at things that would get other people fired. That’s nurse friendship.”
- “A nursing friend knows how to turn your worst day into a slightly less terrible one.”
- “Only a true nursing friend understands the importance of a well-timed coffee break.”
- “With a nursing friend, you don’t need words, just a look, and you burst out laughing.”
- “Our idea of ‘catching up’ is swapping stories about the weirdest patients of the week.”
- “With nursing friends, laughter is just as contagious as MRSA, but much more welcome.”
- “A nursing friend is someone you can share your darkest humor with and still get a high five.”
- “True friendship is texting your nurse bestie at 2 AM what you complained about at 2 PM.”
- “Some friends are built on hobbies. Ours was built on trauma bonding and 12-hour shifts.”
- “Nurse friends understand what you mean when you say ‘I can’t even’ while walking into a shift.”
- “Friends help you move. Nurse friends help you lift unconscious patients and emotional baggage.”
- “You know you’re real friends when you’ve both used the same stethoscope and don’t freak out.”
- “Nursing friendships are a different kind of love. Like, ‘I’ll hold the butt cheeks while you clean the butt crack’ kind of love!” — Unknown

Section 6 of 13:

Funny Nurse One-Liners

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Share a silly, snappy one-liner to laugh through the chaos. A sharp one-liner is like the espresso shot you dream of during a shift—it instantly wakes you up and helps you make it through the day. Here are some zingy one-liners that are sure to leave you in stitches:^{[7]
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- “Vitals are stable. I’m not.”
- “Scrubs on, will to live off.”
- “This is my resting shift face.”
- “Saving lives and rolling eyes.”
- “I wipe tears, fears, and rears.”
- “Powered by coffee and chaos.”
- “My stethoscope hears lies too.”
- “I see more butts than a toilet seat.”
- “This nurse is 90% caffeine, 10% sass.”
- “I know CPR…and I’m not afraid to use it.”
- “You call it a night out. I call it a night shift.”
- “Nurse’s prescription: 8 oz ETOH q4h PRN.”
- “Nurses: The real reason doctors look good.”
- “If sarcasm was a medication, I’d be on a drip.”
- “I’m a nurse. What’s your excuse for being late?”
- “I don’t do drama. I do vitals, meds, and miracles.”
- “Nurses don’t get mad, we just document thoroughly.”
- “You don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps.”
- “I have a PhD in patient care and a minor in sarcasm.”
- “I didn’t choose the scrub life, the scrub life chose me.”
- “My love language is someone offering to do my vitals.”
- “You don’t need a PhD to know that I’m the real hero here.”
- “If I had a dollar for every ‘Nurse!’ yelled down a hallway…”
- “I may not know your name, but I definitely know your vitals.”
- “If you think I’m bossy, wait until you meet the charge nurse.”
- “Never upset a pediatric nurse. They have very little patients.”
- “Nurse life: Where coffee is a food group and sleep is a myth.”
- “I don’t need a vacation…I need 12 uninterrupted hours of sleep!”
- “I’m not a magician, but I can make your pain disappear…eventually.”
- “Being a nurse is like tying your shoe…except the laces are on fire and so are you.”

Section 7 of 13:

Funny Sayings for Patients

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Tell your patient a funny joke or quip to ease their mind. Looking for a way to calm down your patients and lighten the mood? Share any of the following lines to reduce tension and make them feel comfortable:
- “I bring drugs…legally.”
- “Your body’s being dramatic again.”
- “I’ll be back in 10 hospital minutes.”
- “Can I legally get you anything else?”
- “You take the meds, I’ll take the credit.”
- “I’m not a doctor, but I do watch one on TV.”
- “I’m basically your hospital tour guide…with needles.”
- “You’re my favorite patient today… Don’t tell the others!”
- “If anything weird happens, blame it on the hospital food.”
- “You’re doing great! Better than me before my third coffee.”
- “Don’t worry…I watched a YouTube tutorial right before this.”
- When sending a patient for an X-ray: “Smile for the camera.”
- “Good news! Your blood pressure is better than my dating life.”
- Patient: “Is this going to hurt?” Nurse: “No, I won’t feel a thing.”
- When injecting a patient: “You’re my favorite pin cushion today.”
- “Let me check your pulse to see if you’re still putting up with me.”
- “You’re doing better than my last patient, but don’t tell them that.”
- “No need to worry—I’ve seen more chaos than a reality TV show!”
- “We’re going to take good care of you…just let me finish my snack first.”
- “Don’t worry, I’ve watched too many episodes of Grey’s Anatomy for this.”
- “I know you’re not feeling great, but at least you don’t have to do paperwork!”
- “You just close your eyes and I’ll close mine, and it’ll be over before we know it!”
- When transporting a patient in a wheelchair: “How do you feel about drifting?”
- “Think of this as a free spa day…just with fewer cucumbers and more bandages.”
- When flushing a patient’s line: “Alright, I’m injecting $20 into your bloodstream.”
- “I’ll be your nurse today…unless you make me mad. Then, you’ll get my evil twin.”
- “I’m here to make you feel better, but I need you to stop Googling your symptoms first.”
- Nurse: “Are you afraid of needles?” Patient: “No.” Nurse: “I wish I could say the same.”
- Older patient struggling to stand: “Don’t ever get old.” Nurse: “Well, it beats the alternative.”
- When wheeling a patient through a doorway: “Please keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times, and no flash photography.”

Section 8 of 13:

Funny Nurse Captions for Instagram

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Spice up your Instagram post with a funny nurse caption. Instagram is the perfect place to show off the #NurseLife…and your sparkling sense of humor. Here are some silly, punny, and relatable caption ideas to get the giggles going:
- Send help.
- Tired but wired.
- Vitals before titles.
- Us 🤝 patient drama
- Sponsored by scrubs.
- Not easily grossed out.
- Cold hands, warm heart.
- Patient care is my cardio.
- I came. I cared. I charted.
- Saving lives and taking names.
- If love can’t cure it, nurses can.
- Vitals? Fine. Me? Not so much.
- Nurse by day, superhero by night.
- Nurses are angels in comfy shoes.
- Yes I charted. No it wasn’t accurate.
- Fluent in medical jargon and sarcasm.
- CPR certified, emotionally unavailable.
- Running on coffee, chaos, and a prayer.
- Not all angels wear wings. Some wear scrubs.
- If coffee were a vital sign, I’d be on life support.
- The only thing ugly about nurses is their shoes.
- Meds and microaggressions. #justnursethings 🤪
- Me clocking in like it’s not about to be a battlefield.
- Shift got me like: 😭🫠💀🙄🙃😵‍💫😑🤡🥱😤🤬😖
- I save lives, but I also save my sanity with memes.
- Coffee first, save lives seconds, charting third. Repeat.
- Nursing is lke a regular job, but with more bodily fluids.
- I’m the calm in your storm…until I have to find the vein.
- I save lives. I also save your dignity when you forget to zip your gown.
- One day I’ll find the perfect vein, and the whole world will know my name.

Section 9 of 13:

Funny Nurse Jokes

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Make everyone laugh out loud with a funny nurse joke. From classic knock-knock jokes to punny one-liners, there’s a nurse joke for every mood and situation. Here are some great options to share during your next shift:^{[8]
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- What do transplant nurses hate? Rejection.
- What’s a nurse’s favorite game? Hide and go chart.
- What did the cookie say to the nurse? “I feel crumby.”
- Why did the nurse need a red crayon? To draw blood.
- What’s a nurse’s favorite vital sign? The one that behaves!
- Why are nurses afraid of the outdoors? Too much poison IV.
- What do you call a nurse who is relaxed and smiling? Off duty!
- Knock-knock. Who’s there? HIPAA. HIPAA who? I can’t tell you that.
- What did the nurse cross the road? To silence the IV pump on the other side.
- What did the nurse say when the doctor decided to stay home? “Suture self!”
- What did Dracula say to the nurse? “Please call the doctor. I can’t stop coffin.”
- What’s it called when a hospital runs out of maternity nurses? A midwife crisis.
- Why are night nurses such bad dancers? Their circadian rhythm is generally off.
- All the nurses are dressing up as witches for Halloween! They will be caretakers.
- What’s a nurse’s least favorite room? The break room…becuase they’re never in it!
- What do you tell a nurse when she administers an injection painlessly? “Good jab!”
- Why didn’t one nurse find the other nurse’s joke funny? She had an irony deficiency.
- What did the balloon say to the nurse during a routine checkup? “I feel light-headed.”
- How do you know when a nurse is having a bad day? She won’t stop needling people.
- What did the banana say to the nurse? “I’m here to see the doctor. I’m not peeling well.”
- I asked my wife to dress up as a nurse tonight… to fulfill my fantasy that we have health care.
- The local hospital hired a Roman nurse. Complications arose when the IV was issued to bed #4.
- Had to wait ages for my X-ray today at the hospital. There was only a skeleton staff working.
- What did the blood donor say to the nurse? “I feel super tired; it is such a draining process.”
- How many nurses does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They just have a nursing student do it.
- I used to get heartburn when I ate birthday cake until a nurse advised me to take the candles off first.
- What do a nurse and a wood frog have in common? They can both hold their bladder for a really long time.
- What did the patient say when the nurse informed him that he had acute appendix? “Compared to whom?”
- What did the nurse say to the tonsil? “You should get dressed, because the doctor is going to take you out.”
- What did the nurse say to the man who fainted at the airport terminal? “I think you might have a terminal illness.”
- A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the nurse asks. “No! It’s her husband!”
- I had to take my son to the hospital after he swallowed ten quarters. He was rushed to surgery. After half an hour I saw a nurse so I asked her how he was. She said, “There’s no change yet.”
- A nurse, a doctor, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar. The nurse sits down at the bar and says, “I’ll have a Bloody Mary!” The doctor sits next to her and says, “Give me a rum and coke!” The anti-vaxxer says, “No shots for me.”

Section 10 of 13:

Inspirational Nurse Quotes

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Motivate yourself and others with an inspirational nurse saying. When you’re dealing with burnout, grief, trauma, or exhaustion, it can be difficult to make it through the day. Here are some empowering and inspirational nurse quotes to remind you why nurses are the heart of healthcare:^{[9]
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- “We only have what we give.” — Isabel Allende
- “Caring is the essence of nursing.” — Jean Watson
- “Treat every patient like they are family.” — Unknown
- “Be the nurse you would want as a patient.” — Unknown
- “Nursing: The toughest job you’ll ever love.” — Unknown
- “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle.” — Plato
- “Value what you do and add value by what you do.” — Unknown
- “Nurses—one of the few blessings of being ill.” — Sara Moss-Wolfe
- “What angels are to the sad, nurses are to the sick.” — Amit Kalantri
- “A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope.” — Carrie Latet
- “Success comes to those who are too busy to look for it.” — Henry David Thoreau
- “America’s nurses are the beating heart of our medical system.” — Barack Obama
- “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.” — Mother Teresa
- “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” — Mahatma Gandhi
- “Nurses dispense comfort, compassion, and caring without even a prescription.” — Val Saintsbury
- “Nursing is one of the fine arts: I had almost said ‘the finest of fine arts.’” — Florence Nightingale
- “There no longer has to be a difference between who you are and what you do.” — Gary Vaynerchuk
- “They may forget your name, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou
- “The character of the nurse is as important as the knowledge she possesses.” — Carolyn Jarvis
- “Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts.” — Charles Dickens
- “Nursing is not for the faint of heart; it requires strength, endurance, and an unwavering spirit.” — Unknown
- “When you’re a nurse, you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours.” — Unknown
- “You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” — John Bunyan
- “Every nurse was drawn to nursing because of a desire to care, to serve, or to help.” — Christina Feist-Heilmeier, RN
- “Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon.” — Dag Hammarskjöld
- “Your worth consists in what you are, and not in what you have. What you are will show in what you do.” — Thomas Davidson
- “To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “Our job as nurses is to cushion the sorrow and celebrate the job, every day, while we are ‘just doing our jobs.’” — Christine Belle
- “Nurse: Just another word to describe a person strong enough to tolerate anything and soft enough to understand anyone.” — Unknown
- “The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest.” — Dr. William Osler
- “Your profession is not what brings home your paycheck. Your profession is what you were put on Earth to do with such passion and such intensity that it becomes spiritual in calling.” — Vincent Van Gogh

Section 11 of 13:

Famous Nurse Quotes

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These quotes about nurses are moving and empowering. Nurses are some of the bravest and most hardworking people in the world. Check out these quotes from famous thinkers on the role and power of nurses:^{[10]
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- “Our fingerprints don’t fade from the lives we touch.” — Judy Blume
- “It would not be possible to praise nurses too highly.” — Stephen Ambrose
- “Let us never consider ourselves finished, nurses. We must be learning all of our lives.” — Florence Nightingale
- “Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy…nurses are rarely short on caring.” — Sharon Hudacek
- “Remember, nurses are like icebergs. At any one time, you are only seeing what they are actually doing.” — Ian Miller
- “The doctors may be mapping out the war games, but it is the nurses who make the conflict bearable.” — Jodi Picoult
- “Nurses are a unique kind. They have this insatiable need to care for others, which is both their biggest strength and fatal flaw.” — Dr. Jean Watson
- “A nurse is one who opens the eyes of a newborn and gently closes the eyes of a dying man. It is indeed a high blessing to be the first and last to witness the beginning and end of life.” — Unknown
- “The nurse is temporarily the consciousness of the unconscious, the love of life of the suicidal, the leg of the amputee, the eyes of the newly blind, a means of locomotion for the newborn, knowledge, and confidence for the young mother, a voice for those too weak to speak, and so on.” — Virginia Henderson, RN

Section 12 of 13:

Funny Health Quotes

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These quotes prove laughter is the best medicine. Looking for a laugh? Try these silly and clever quotes about general health and healthcare:^{[11]
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- “Quit worrying about your health. It’ll go away.” — Robert Orben
- “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” — Erma Bombeck
- “I am dying with the help of too many physicians.” — Alexander the Great
- “Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?” — George Carlin
- “Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.” — Lily Tomlin
- “Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.” — Mark Twain
- “Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.” — Redd Foxx
- “Older people shouldn't eat health food. They need all the preservatives they can get.” — Robert Orben
- “It’s no longer a question of staying healthy. It’s a question of finding a sickness you like.” — Jackie Mason 
- “My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.” — Milton Berle

Section 13 of 13:

The Power of Nurse Humor

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Humor can help you deal with the stress and challenges of nursing. It’s no secret that nursing is an emotionally and physically demanding job, and a well-timed joke or funny saying can help you decompress after an intense moment or long, grueling shift. In fact, studies show that laughter can reduce stress, relax your muscles, boost your immune system, and increase the endorphins released by your brain!^{[12]
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- Additionally, sharing a funny quote with a fellow nurse can strengthen your bond, while sharing a silly saying or quip with a patient can help ease their anxieties.

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What funny phrases can you say when the shift is really busy?

Julia Eze, NP-C
Board Certified Family Nurse Practitioner
Julia Eze, MSN, RN, NP-C, is a board-certified Family Nurse Practitioner based in Atlanta, Georgia. With over 10 years of experience, Julia is a health media expert and digital creator who leverages her nursing experience to create content around health equity, wellness, fitness, the advancement of nursing, and more. She has partnered with more than 30 global brands to provide comprehensive, educational information for her everyday viewers and is the owner of Absobility, a creative agency in the health and wellness space. Julia is also the founder of The Nurse Link, a social enterprise that connects current, future, and aspiring nurses for mentorship, networking, and empowerment through event curation and community building. Julia has been featured on NBC, CNN, Pop Sugar, nurse.org, and more. She has a bachelor’s in nursing from Georgia State University, a master’s in nursing from Mercer University, and is licensed by the American Academy of Nurse Practitioners Certification Board.

Julia Eze, NP-C

Board Certified Family Nurse Practitioner

Expert Answer

“But did you die?” is one of them. It’s funny, but also kind of an inside joke, especially when it's really busy. “But did you die?” has been around for a while. Another classic one is anything related to the full moon. You never, ever mention it’s a full moon during your shift, because it’s believed that doing so will make chaos break loose on the unit. So if it’s a full moon, you just quietly deal with whatever comes your way and never say it out loud.

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