This article was co-authored by Elaine Swann and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano. Elaine Swann is a lifestyle and etiquette coach based in Carlsbad, CA. With over 22 years of experience, Elaine is the founder of The Swann School of Protocol, an etiquette training institute offering courses and classes for children, teens, college students, and adults. In 2017, she launched a certification program to train individuals in the areas of etiquette and operate their own etiquette consulting businesses, and a licensing program that allows people to operate as The Swann School of Protocol in their city. Elaine has written multiple books on etiquette, Girls Have Style (2005), Let Crazy Be Crazy (2014), and most recently, Elaine Swann’s Book of Modern Etiquette (2025). She has been referred to as the Emily Post of the Digital Age by the New York Times, and shares her advice on The Today Show, Access Hollywood, CNN, The Sherri Show, The Jennifer Hudson Show, and more.
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It can be hard to know what to do when someone you care about says they’re having a bad day. How do you respond in a way that’ll support and reassure them? We talked with licensed clinical psychologists to bring you the best advice on how to cheer up and support your loved ones when they need it most. We’ll give you a spoiler: the best thing you can do is listen.
How to Respond When Someone Is Having a Bad Day
When someone says they’re having a bad day, respond with support and validation. Try saying or texting something like, “I’m sorry to hear you’re having a bad day,” “I’m here to listen if you want to share,” or “Is there anything I can do to help?” These statements reassure them that they’re not alone.
Steps
Expert Q&A
Tips
References
- ↑ Elaine Swann. Lifestyle and Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/for-friends-and-family/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/emotional-validation
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/depression/helping-someone-with-depression
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-things-to-say-to-someone-with-depression-or-whos-depressed#1
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-nourishment/202404/having-a-bad-day
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-things-to-say-to-someone-with-depression-or-whos-depressed#1
- ↑ Elaine Swann. Lifestyle and Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/for-friends-and-family/
- ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/for-friends-and-family/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/emotional-validation
- ↑ https://www.nm.org/healthbeat/healthy-tips/emotional-health/the-best-and-worst-ways-to-support-a-friend-with-a-serious-illness
- ↑ https://www.southernliving.com/encouragement-quotes-7508714
- ↑ Vernita Marsh, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Consultant, & Speaker. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/relationships/communication/active-listening
- ↑ https://wayne.edu/learning-communities/pdf/becoming-active-listener-13.pdf
- ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/validation-defusing-intense-emotions-202308142961
- ↑ Elaine Swann. Lifestyle and Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/relationships/communication/active-listening
- ↑ Elaine Swann. Lifestyle and Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/grief/helping-someone-who-is-grieving
- ↑ Ran D. Anbar, MD, FAAP. Pediatric Pulmonologist & Medical Counselor. Expert Interview
- ↑ https://mhanational.org/blog/10-ways-to-cheer-someone-up-right-now/
- ↑ Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist (PSY #31949). Expert Interview
- ↑ https://mhanational.org/blog/10-ways-to-cheer-someone-up-right-now/
- ↑ Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist (PSY #31949). Expert Interview

















