9 Ways to Nicely Curve Someone Over Text

Use these messages to make it clear that you’re not interested

Co-authored by John Keegan and Devin McSween

Last Updated: January 29, 2026 Fact Checked

If there’s someone who’s romantically interested in you but you’re not into them, you may be wondering how to curve them, or indirectly reject them without hurting their feelings. Luckily, there are plenty of nice and subtle texts you can send to help them get the hint, without turning them down directly. At the end of the day, honesty is the best policy, though. So, we’ll also provide advice on how to gently reject someone via text, with help from relationship experts.

How do I curve someone nicely?

To curve someone nicely (or gently and indirectly reject them), casually put them in the friendzone. Mention your great friendship and use nicknames like “bro.” Turn down any flirting by making jokes or changing the subject. Respond to texts infrequently and make excuses to not hang out to help convey your disinterest.

1

Subtly friendzone them.

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Emphasize your friendship to hint that your relationship is strictly platonic. If you know someone’s interested in you, but you’re not interested in them back, relationship advisor Erika Kaplan suggests that you make sure your relationship reads as friends only.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Erika Kaplan
Relationship Advisor

Expert Interview} When the person flirts with you or mentions your relationship, kindly curve them by bringing up how you only see them as a friend and calling them platonic nicknames like “bro,” “buddy,” or “sister.” If they invite you to hang out, ask to bring other friends along.
- “You’re pretty cool too, buddy! I’m glad we’re friends ✨”
- “I’m glad we met, too. It’s nice to have a friend like you in my life.”
- “You’re such a good friend.”
- “Thanks for the compliment, bro! I’m glad we can hype each other up as friends.”
- “The way you tease me reminds me of my brother/sister. You’re seriously like a sibling to me 😅”
- “A movie sounds fun. I’m going to see if the group wants to tag along!”
- “I’m down for drinks! Rebecca said she wanted to try this place, too, so I’ll ask if she can join.”
Meet the wikiHow Experts

Erika Kaplan is a relationship advisor and matchmaker for Three Day Rule, a matchmaking company. She has 11 years of experience helping singles find matches.

Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD is a licensed clinical psychologist with over 25 years of experience. She helps those struggling with relationships, depression, weight gain, eating disorders, and life transitions.

John Keegan is a dating coach, motivational speaker, and owner of The Awakened Lifestyle. He has over 15 years of experience helping people find love.

Maria Avgitidis is a dating coach and CEO of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. She has over 10 years of matchmaking experience.

2

Casually deflect any attempts to flirt.

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Shut down any romantic vibes by making a joke or changing the subject. If someone’s into you, they’ll probably tease and compliment you to see if you’re romantically interested in them, too. So, avoid flirting back to subtly reject them. Laugh off their flirtation attempts and make self-deprecating jokes in response to their compliments. If their messages are getting personal, playful, or suggestive, respond in a boring, matter-of-fact way or simply change the subject.
- “I appreciate the compliment, lol. I’m not nearly as put together in real life.”
- “You’re thinking about me too much 😅 I’m not that interesting.”
- “I like that picture too! It was a fun vacation, even though I got stung by jellyfish.”
- “I did see the movie. It was good.”
- “I had a good weekend, thanks for asking.”
- “Good joke. So, I heard Tyson’s moving. What’s up with that?”
- “I’m not sure what you mean by that. Anyways, how was the game?”
- Steer clear of flirty emojis, like the 😉, 😘, and 😏 emojis. Or, go without any emojis at all to give your messages a more serious rather than playful vibe.

3

Make it seem like you're really busy.

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Texting back slowly and infrequently hints that you’re not into them. Responding to messages quickly and regularly are usually signs that you’re interested in someone. So, if you want to curve them and let them down gently, simply do the opposite. Wait a few hours or days to text them back, and mention that you didn’t see their text or forgot to respond. If they think that you’re too busy to respond, they’ll likely get the hint that you don’t want a relationship with them.
- “Sorry, I forgot to respond! It’s been a busy week 💀”
- “Woops, I didn’t see your message. I’ve had a lot going on.”
- “I’m sorry for not texting. Work has been crazy.”
- “I’ve barely been on my phone, sorry. Life has been so busy 😵‍💫”
- “This weekend has been busy, sorry. I didn’t have a chance to check my texts.”
- “I thought I responded, sorry. I’ve been super busy.”

4

Avoid committing to plans.

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Making excuses and saying you’re busy shows them you’re not interested. When the person subtly asks if you're free or directly asks you to hang out, be vague about whether you’re available or even suggest that you have other plans. Or, tell them that you can’t hang out and give an excuse: maybe you're sick, have family in town, or are swamped with errands. If you’re never making an effort to hang out, they soon clue into the fact that you don’t feel the same as them.
- “I don’t know about dinner, I’m pretty busy right now.”
- “I don’t know what my schedule is like this week, sorry.”
- “I’m pretty busy next month, so I’m not sure we could actually hang out 😕”
- “I don’t know if I can hang out. I have a lot going on this weekend.”
- “Sorry, I already have plans with my friend.”
- “I wish I could hang, but I’m really not feeling well 🤒”
- “I can’t hang, my parents are visiting me right now.”

5

Suggest that you don’t want a relationship.

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Tell them you’re happy being single to signal that their feelings aren’t reciprocal. If the person who’s into you is hinting that they like someone and want to be in a relationship, or even suggesting that you two would be great together, casually tell them that you’re not looking for a relationship. This is a kind and subtle way to indicate that romance isn’t in the cards for you two.
- “Honestly, I love being single! It’s nice to not be tied down, lol 🕺”
- “Nah, I don’t want a relationship right now. It’s too much work.”
- “I’m happy dating myself for now, haha 👍”
- “I’m taking a break from dating for a while.”
- “Idk, I’m not really into anyone right now. I’m fine being single.”
- “I’m not dating anyone, and I’m happy to keep it that way, lol 🙂‍↕️”
- “I’m not looking for a relationship, tbh.”

6

Or, subtly mention that you’re not single.

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Bringing up someone you’re dating also signals disinterest. If the person who has feelings for you realizes that you’re into someone else, whether you’re casually dating them or in a committed relationship, they’ll get the hint that you don’t like them back. Just casually bring up your partner when the person texts you a question or asks if you have plans.
- “Yeah, it was a fun weekend! My boyfriend and I went to the beach 🐬”
- “I’ve actually seen them in concert! My girlfriend got me tickets for my birthday.”
- “I didn’t know anyone else played this game! My partner is a huge fan.”
- “I’m about to be doing a lot better, haha. My boyfriend is making my favorite dinner tonight 🍝”
- “I really want to visit Italy. My girlfriend and I are actually talking about going soon.”
- “Ravi took me to that restaurant last week! It was a great date spot and super romantic.”
- “Sorry, I can’t hang out on Friday. Inez is taking me out on a date 🤩”

7

Change the subject.

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Swerving convos to hang or define the relationship shows your disinterest. Instead of directly acknowledging their attempts to talk to you about going out or starting to date, turn the conversation back to platonic territory. When you don’t engage with their romantic texts, they’ll get the message that you don’t want to have a relationship with them.
- Them: “Are you free Saturday? There’s a new pizza place I want to try.”
  You: “I’m kinda busy, actually. That reminds me, whatever happened to the restaurant you were going to start? 🧐”
- Them: “So, I think I’m catching feelings for someone you might know 😉”
  You: “Aw, that’s nice! Do you remember if Kaia’s party is this weekend or next?”
- Them: “You’re the total package. I could see myself dating someone like you 😉”
  You: “Haha, I am pretty great. Anyway, did you see the football game last night? It was crazy 🏈”

8

Give short or closed-off responses.

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Keeping your messages matter-of-fact leaves little room for romantic vibes. Being short and to the point in your texts isn’t overly friendly and kind, but it’s still a polite way to convey your lack of romantic interest without directly rejecting the person. Simply answer the person’s questions without much elaboration, and avoid asking them questions back.
- Them: “What’d you get up to this weekend?”
  You: “I just hung out around the house.”
- Them: “So your parents were visiting you?”
  You: “Yep. They live upstate.”
- Them: “How long have you lived in the city?”
  You: “I’ve been here a few years.”

9

Be direct and gentle.

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Kindly tell the person that you aren’t interested in dating them. The best way to curve someone nicely is to simply be honest and let them know you aren’t interested in a relationship with them. As relationship psychologist Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD says, “If someone can’t seem to take your indirect hints, it is time to be kindly direct, proactive, and firm.”^{[2]
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Expert Source

Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD
Relationship Psychologist

Expert Interview} Dating coach John Keegan suggests telling the person that you’re flattered, but ultimately you don’t feel any romance or chemistry between you.^{[3]
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Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach

Expert Interview}
- “Thank you for the invitation, I really appreciate it. But, I’m not interested in a relationship.”
- “I’m really flattered, thank you for asking me out. I’m just not feeling a romantic connection between us.”
- “I really appreciate the invitation. But I have to say no, thank you. I don’t feel the romantic spark.”
- “I think you’re really great, and deserve someone who is, too. I don’t think that we’re a good match.”
- “You’re really amazing. Unfortunately, I’m not interested in dating you.”
- “I like you and think you’re great, but I’m not getting any romantic vibes. I only see us as friends.”
- If you went out on a date, dating coach Maria Avgitidis suggests saying something like, "I had a good time on our date and it was nice meeting you. Unfortunately, I don't feel long-term chemistry. Genuinely wishing you luck on your search! Thank you for being an absolute gentleman/lady.”^{[4]
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  Expert Source
  
  Maria Avgitidis
  Dating Coach
  
  Expert Interview}
- While rejecting someone can feel awkward and uncomfortable, Keegan says that doing it politely is the best thing you can do. He notes that it gives the person closure on the situation, which helps them feel better.^{[5]
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  Expert Source
  
  John Keegan
  Dating Coach
  
  Expert Interview}