How to Stimulate the Clitoris for Solo Play and Partners

Plus, a review of where the clitoris is and what it does

Co-authored by Womanizer and Dan Hickey

Last Updated: December 11, 2025 Fact Checked

• What is the clitoris?
|
• Solo Stimulation
|
• Partnered Stimulation
|
• Final Thoughts
|
• Tips

|Show more |Show less

This article was created in collaboration with an advertising partner. Learn more here.

Pop culture might have you believe that finding and stimulating the clitoris is a daunting task, but in reality, there are plenty of easy ways to feel clitoral bliss! That’s why we’ve partnered with the pleasure experts at Womanizer to share the best ways to stimulate the clitoris. Womanizer is a trailblazing brand with a mission to break taboos and make “me-time” a celebrated act of self-care to close the female orgasm gap. Read on to learn how to stimulate the clitoris by yourself or with a partner. We’ll also recap what the clitoris does, where it is, and how it delivers pleasure to help you (or your partner) feel confident in exploring your body.

Clitoral Stimulation Techniques

The clitoris is a sensitive organ on top of the vulva responsible for sexual pleasure. Stimulate it by hand with massaging or pinching motions, or even better, use a vibrator for more intense pleasure. Oral sex or a partner’s genitals can also stimulate the clitoris. What feels pleasurable varies from person to person.

Steps

Section 1 of 4:

The Clitoris, Explained

1. 
   1
   The clitoris is the “pleasure center” of your reproductive anatomy. It’s a small sexual organ that actually has no direct role in reproduction—its sole purpose is to feel good! It’s made of spongy tissue that swells when you’re sexually aroused, increasing its sensitivity. In fact, the clitoris has around 10,000 nerve endings, making it even more sensitive than the glans (tip) of a penis.
2. 
   2
   The clitoris is located at the top of the vulva, where the inner labia meet. For a refresher, the vulva encompasses all of the exterior parts of your genitals, and the inner labia (labia minora) are the inner folds of skin (or “lips”) around the vaginal opening. The tip of the clitoris sits just underneath where the inner labia meet and form a “hood” of skin known as the clitoral hood. It’s above the vagina and urethra (the hole you pee out of).

   • The tip of the clitoris underneath the clitoral hood may appear as small as a pea or as big as a thumb.
3. 
   3
   The clitoris extends inside your body. What you see below the clitoral hood is just the tip of the clitoris (called the glans). The rest of the organ extends deeper inside your body (the shaft), then back and down both sides of your vaginal canal (the crura, or the legs that form a “wishbone” shape around the vagina). The clitoris also contains two vestibular bulbs between the crura and vagina. Altogether, the entire clitoris is about 5 inches (12.7 cm) long.
4. 
   4
   The clitoris swells when you’re aroused and helps you achieve orgasm. During arousal, the blood vessels in your pelvis, vulva, and clitoris fill up (leading to what some people call a “full” feeling in the genitals). This causes the clitoris and vulva to swell and become more sensitive (it’s believed that the vestibular bulbs of the clitoris can grow to twice their usual size). The vagina and labia also become wet with a clear fluid, and muscles in your pelvis and throughout your body begin to tighten.

   • Stimulating the clitoris (and other sensitive areas) during arousal leads to a peak in muscle tension. The sudden release of this tension and the enjoyable muscle spasms that follow are called an orgasm.
   • More study is needed, but some research suggests that pressure from the swollen clitoris on the vagina may be linked to G-spot pleasure. The G-spot is located just a few inches inside the vagina, where the vestibular bulbs rub up against the vaginal wall. If this connection is real, then that means vaginal orgasms may be related to clitoral stimulation.
   • After orgasm, the body relaxes and the clitoris returns to its normal size.
Advertisement

Section 2 of 4:

Stimulating the Clitoris During Solo Play

1. 
   1
   Start slowly and lightly. Sometimes, it can take a few minutes to get relaxed and aroused, and for some people, the clitoris might feel too sensitive to touch right away without a short warmup. When you’re just getting started, try gently touching, stroking, or rubbing your labia, vulva, or clitoral hood first before making contact with the clitoris.

   • When you feel ready, touch your clitoris with gentle strokes and light pressure. Follow what feels good and apply more pressure or speed as you like.
   • Using water-based lube can make your touches feel lighter and more delicate. Consider using some if you’re extra sensitive or looking for a new sensation.
2. 
   2
   Explore different finger techniques to see what feels good. Everyone has different approaches and preferences when it comes to clitoral stimulation, so there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to what feels pleasurable. Here are a few techniques to play around with when you have some alone time:

   • Rubbing: Slide your fingers, hand, or a sex toy in circles or side-to-side over the clitoris and clitoral hood.
   • Tapping: Tap your fingers on your clitoris, exploring different speeds and pressures.
   • Grinding: Straddle a pillow or other object and grind against it, putting pressure on your clitoris.
   • Pinching: Softly pinch your clitoris or clitoral hood and slide your fingers in an up-and-down motion, or tug up and down.
   • Massaging: Massage your clitoris or other erogenous areas like your labia, vaginal opening, inner thighs, perineum, anus, nipples, or anywhere else that feels good.
3. 
   3
   Introduce a vibrator for more intense sensations. If you need more stimulation, you can rub, tap, or massage your clitoris with a vibrator for deeper, more intense pleasure (for many clitoris owners, using a vibrator is the fastest and easiest route to orgasm). Start with a light touch on a low setting, then increase the intensity as desired.

   • If you’re looking for a no-frills, big-on-power toy, we recommend the We-Vibe Tango X intense bullet vibrator. This discreet and quiet toy provides deep, rumbly vibration modes for your pleasure.
   • The Next 3D Pleasure Air Stimulator with Climax Control uses pulsating air pressure to mimic natural suction for a deeper, more lifelike sensation. Plus, you can control the depth of the air waves for a more nuanced, fuller multiple orgasm journey.
   • For a feeling more like receiving oral sex, the Womanizer Enhance provides vibrations along with suction and massaging sensations over the clitoris. Just place the silicone “suction cup” over the clitoris and adjust the vibration and air-pulsing settings to find a combo you love. An external study by the Berlin Institute for Innovation (BIFI) showed a 100% orgasm rate among participants!
4. 
   4
   Try stimulating the clitoris internally with your fingers or a toy. As we mentioned before, most of the clitoris is actually inside your body. So, massaging or using a vibrator on that “sweet spot” can help stimulate your clitoris from the inside. Insert your fingers or a toy just a few inches inside the vagina and apply pressure to the front (upper) wall of the vagina to see what feels good. If you’re using your fingers, try a “come hither” motion, or if you’re using a toy, rub or apply pressure along the vaginal wall. You can also rub your clitoris on the outside with one hand while massaging it from the inside at the same time for a more intense sensation.

   • It may take some time and practice to find the most pleasurable spot, so be patient, take it slow, and enjoy the journey!
   • The Womanizer DUO 2 Clitoral and G-Spot Stimulator is a vibrator that provides internal and external stimulation at the same time. The gently curved shaft of the toy delivers rumbly vibrations inside the vagina, while the stimulator head delivers suction and massage sensations to the clitoris with targeted pulses of air. With 14 intensity levels and 10 vibration patterns, there’s a perfect setting for every body.
Advertisement

Section 3 of 4:

Stimulating the Clitoris During Partnered Play

1. 
   1
   Tell your partner how you like to be stimulated. Communication is the key to great sex, so don’t feel afraid to give your partner gentle instructions about how you like to be touched or what gets you aroused. You can tell them what to do from the get-go (“Rub my clitoris in circles first”), or encourage them if they’re on the right track (“Keep doing that, but harder/faster”).

   • For partners: If you’re unsure how to approach your partner’s clitoris, just ask! You could say, “Does it feel good when I do this?” or even ask them to touch themselves first so you can see what they enjoy.
2. 
   2
   Stimulate the clitoris by hand or with a sex toy during penetrative sex. For some, vaginal sex alone isn’t quite enough to reach orgasm. Thankfully, there are plenty of sex positions that allow you or your penetrative partner to rub or massage the clitoris (with your hands or a vibrator) while doing the deed for extra pleasure. Once you find a position you like, take a free hand and go to town (or request that your partner take control). Here are some positions to try:

   • Side-by-side or spooning: Lie on your sides facing the same direction while your partner enters you from behind. You or your partner can stimulate the clitoris with a free hand (you may need to spread or widen your legs to make it easier).
   • Missionary: Lie on your back with your partner facedown on top of you. Press close together so their penis or strap-on can rub against the clitoris, or use your hand to rub the clitoris manually.
   • Doggy style: Get on all fours and have your partner enter you from behind. Use your own hands to massage the clitoris, or have your partner reach around to do it themselves.
   • What are the best toys to use? Anything that’s easy to hold while you’re doing the deed and feels good will work! We recommend the We-Vibe Wand 2 or the Vibe from Womanizer. They’re both cordless, easy to hold with a silicone grip, and deliver powerful but quiet vibrations—perfect for raising the intensity without any noisy distractions.
3. 
   3
   Play with different sex positions that rub or put pressure on the clitoris. You don’t always have to use your hands for clitoral stimulation—there are plenty of positions that naturally bump and grind against it, too. Here are a few to experiment with if you feel like having a hands-free clitoral rush:

   • The face-off: Have your partner sit on the edge of the bed, then face them and straddle their lap. Get close and thrust or gyrate against their body for clitoral stimulation.
   • The sea shell: Lie on your back with your legs raised as far up and back as you can comfortably go to expose your vulva. Have your partner enter you like in missionary, but just a bit higher so their pelvis is right against your clitoris.
   • Cowgirl: Have the penetrating partner lie on their back, then straddle them face-to-face, leaning forward slightly to increase the contact with your clitoris.
4. 
   4
   Place pillows under your pelvis and grind against them during sex. If you enjoy the sensation of pressure on your clitoris, try putting a pillow or a bunched-up blanket underneath your pubic bone. Then, grind or rub yourself against it while your partner penetrates you from behind.

   • You don’t have to stick with just pillows. Get creative and try the arm of a couch or chair, or any other piece of furniture or object that gives you the pressure you crave.
5. 
   5
   Use a vibrator or a couple’s sex toy for added pleasure. Having a vibrating sex toy on or near the clitoris can heighten the pleasure of sex and help you reach quicker and more satisfying orgasms. You can hold a vibrator or suction device against the clitoris, or use a wearable vibrator designed for couples to enjoy together.

   • The We-Vibe Chorus couples vibrator is worn by the receptive partner during sex and vibrates against the clitoris, G-spot, and penis (when it’s inside) all at once. It’s controlled through the We-Vibe app or with a pressure-sensitive remote—the harder you squeeze, the more intense the vibrations. It’s perfect for playing at home, in public, or even long-distance.
   • The We-Vibe Bond wearable stimulation ring is a penis ring that delivers vibrational pleasure for the penetrative partner (and to the receptive partner when they’re being penetrated). It can be controlled from a distance with the We-Vibe app, putting power in the hands of whoever has the phone!
6. 
   6
   Try oral sex. Penetrative sex isn’t the only way to enjoy clitoral stimulation with a partner. If they enjoy giving (and you enjoy receiving) oral sex, have them use their lips and tongue to gently circle, caress, or suck the clitoris and the area around it. Encourage them to try a variety of pressures and speeds to see what feels good, and offer some guidance or instruction if you’d like them to do something specific (“Do that again, but slower”).
Advertisement

Section 4 of 4:

Final Thoughts

1. 
   No two clitorises are the same, so explore the techniques that feel good to you. Don’t be afraid to switch things up—there’s no right or wrong way to experience clitoral pleasure! Take some time to get to know your body solo, and experiment with your fingers or toys to figure out what works (and what doesn’t) so you feel sexually confident. Communicate with your sexual partners about what you like, too, so that clitoral stimulation is always in your reach (and de-mystified for your partners).

Expert Q&A

Search

Add New Question

Ask a Question

200 characters left

Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.

Submit

Advertisement

Tips

• If you experience any clitoral pain, soreness, itchiness, changes in appearance, or have trouble feeling stimulated, consult a healthcare professional. Regular pelvic exams and Pap smears can detect conditions that may impact your clitoris and sexual health.
  Thanks

  Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

Submit a Tip

All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published

Name

Please provide your name and last initial

Submit

Thanks for submitting a tip for review!

Advertisement