Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW Website

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

Psychotherapist

Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is also an award-winning and best-selling author. Her latest book, “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues", details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each.

Education

  • University of Pennsylvania, MSW
  • University of Florida, BA, Health/Sociology

Professional Achievements

  • Published "Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues" in 2024
  • Published “Professor Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband” in 2010
  • Published “Thriving with ADHD” in 2018, winner of the Indie Book Award and Firebird Book Award
  • Co-hosted advice show on LA Talk Radio, currently hosts livestream show on Balance by Nature
  • Columnist for Psychology Today

Certifications & Organizations

  • Licensed Clinical Social Worker
  • Spokesperson for Brillia, ADHD Awareness
  • Psychotherapist Consultant for Cognitive Leap

Philosophy

Kelli strives to provide both immediate, short-term solutions and long-term, in-depth care for a wide variety of clients. Her strengths include helping clients develop better self-esteem, facilitating open and constructive communication among family members, and working with romantic partners to address underlying causes of dissatisfaction in a relationship.

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Forum Comments (35)

I need help with my life
I'm so happy you reached out. Times like this are meant for support and to remember you're not alone in what you're feeling. To start, the feeling "behind" is very common when we compare where we think we should be or use our friends or family members as barometers of our success. But remember, we are all on the same journey, just different points along the way. If you can imagine a circular running track of life rather than a flat line with one beginning point and one end point. In other words, we all get to the same point, but just maybe at different times.

I also hear overwhelm. This idea of how can I figure out the rest of my life? Can you start with small actions rather than one big action? In other words, what is one thing today that you can do to think or act upon about what makes you happy in regard to your future? Is it applying to one job/internship? Is it brainstorming 5 ways to use this gap year? Be patient, as you were wise to take this year to figure things out, and that's perfectly ok. Finally, ask yourself, what is the worst thing that can happen if you make the "wrong" choice? You gain new information that you didn't like, and you get to pivot to the next thing. So there is no "wrong" choice. Please remember to balance work with play while you figure all this out- that's important.

I am a licensed clinical social worker providing general information for educational purposes only. I am not liable for any decisions made or actions taken based on the information provided.
How can I reconnect with my ex after a painful breakup that happened just before our wedding?
I don't believe it's ever too late to rebuild communication. I'm a big fan of honesty and accountability. So if you start with your part in the relationship's demise (for ex: "I realized I wasn't the best listener at times and I often dismissed your concerns"), your ex may soften and even give their side. The key is to try not to have any expectations. The goal of the conversation is for you to take ownership of your part first. If the conversation is going well and defenses are down, then you can express whatever it is you need to say to help you heal. Wishing you luck!

I am a licensed clinical social worker providing general information for educational purposes only. I am not liable for any decisions made or actions taken based on the information provided.
Why do I put people ahead of me?
It's time to look inward and ask yourself: "Why am I continuing to overextend even when my boundaries are pushed?" Are you doing this so your friends will continue to 'like' you? Are you hoping they will return the favor? Either way, it doesn't sound like it's something you like and want to continue doing, and that's ok. I believe the best way to look at this is next time you get presented with an opportunity to help, ask yourself: "Am I doing this for fun and free?" Meaning - I'll do this if I truly want to help them and I'm not expecting anything in return. That being said, the only way for your friends to stop taking advantage of you is for you to stop overextending.

I am a licensed clinical social worker providing general information for educational purposes only. I am not liable for any decisions made or actions taken based on the information provided.
How should I end my friendship
First, I want to say that it's not only ok to want to end a toxic friendship, but it's wise. A lot of times, we feel bad if we are ending a friendship, even if we realize it's not good for us. We feel we need to maintain the relationship for a variety of reasons: previous history, guilt, the person is friends with other friends of ours, etc. But just like anything in life-- a job, a relationship, a friendship-- if you recognize it's not good for you mentally, it's a smart decision to honor your feelings.

I would say something like this to your friend: "I realize that this friendship is no longer serving me the way that I need. I'm going to take space from this, and I'm wishing you the best."

I am a licensed clinical social worker providing general information for educational purposes only. I am not liable for any decisions made or actions taken based on the information provided.
How do I tell if I'm in love?
There is a reason that movies and songs constantly talk about love. It feels really good! So to answer your question, I believe most people would agree and say it feels really nice to be in love, especially in the beginning when your hormones are secreting dopamine and oxytocin.

But there is a difference between feeling in love and determining if that partner is the "right" person for you. Just because you love someone doesn't make them automatically right for you. We must remember that love isn't just a feeling, but a verb. In other words, do you feel loved back by your partner? Are they treating you kindly, respecting your needs, and do you feel like yourself around them, where you can also communicate openly? These are all important qualities to think about when determining if it's the right person for you.

I also believe strongly in trusting your gut; we have the answers deep within us. When you think about whether this is the "right" person for you, what comes up for you? We shouldn't have to convince ourselves if someone is right for us or make excuses for their behavior. It should feel like a natural yes.

I am a licensed clinical social worker providing general information for educational purposes only. I am not liable for any decisions made or actions taken based on the information provided.
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